So, at time of writing, I'm also writing a separate post called "Art, and why you should do it yourself." and I got into the anecdote you're about to see to make a point about the value of putting in the time. The tale grew in the telling and an aside became a tangent, became the vast majority of the post. I do still think there's value in the story but it was quite a grievous diatribe to be an aside in aid of making a wider point, so I'm giving it its own post, for anyone who doesn't want to read a lengthy anecdote in the last one, as well as anyone who would like to read how I came to appreciate incremental progress.
So, without further ado, here's how Kingdom Hearts taught me the value of putting in the time.
See, when I was but a lad, of the tender age of...I don't remember...not important I guess, I was stuck on the last boss in the story of the original Kingdom Hearts. It was frustrating me, so I went to the Olympus Coliseum to do the last tournament in the hope of getting a level-up or a new weapon to make this a little easier.
I did indeed acquire both of those things, but what I also gained was access to the gold and platinum matches. (I think, I may have had them before, it's been a while.) I did the gold one without much trouble, so when I hit that last row of question marks in the fight menu, I did so with reasonable confidence, and anyone who has played this game knows exactly what happened next.
The match in question is against Sephiroth, who you may remember from Super Smash Bros Ultimate (and I think he's a Glup Shitto in a Final Fantasy or something, I don't know I don't really follow Sega games)
Poe's law being a thing I feel compelled to clarify that that was of course, a joke. I know Sephiroth is the iconic villain of Final Fantasy VII and I was as awestruck by that fight's intro cutscene as anybody, and when his equally iconic theme music hit, I felt my adrenaline spike. "All right! Let's fuckin' do this!" I said aloud as he slowly approached.
Then I blinked, and my health was at one. I hadn't expected my newly acquired "Second Chance" ability (that lets you keep a hit point if an attack would otherwise kill you) to come into play so soon after getting it. As soon as I realise what's happened, he's hit me again and I'm out.
After recovering from the short-circuit that immediate loss had shocked my brain into, I tried again, I lasted exactly as long, even without the element of surprise against me. I don't remember what level Sora was at this point, but I seem to remember it being below 50. I never bothered grinding because new weapons and equipment had always given much more noticeable increases. Following that logic, I went to the internet to seek out the best equipment.
'Twas there I learned, that the best equipment was only available via item synthesis, a mechanic I had all-but ignored, unless I happened to have the materials on-hand at the time. I then found, that the "ultimate weapons" only become available once you have synthesised at least one of every other thing in the shop. I immediately discounted that as an option, because it would've taken forever.
Two days later at school I borrowed a cheat disc from a friend (remember those?) to cheat my way there on his recommendation after I told him of my humiliation, only to find, that it was one of those PS2 discs that was blue at the back instead of a clear reflective surface. This wouldn't be a problem, but my PS2 of the time was on its way out and no longer read those particular discs for some reason, so that was out.
By then it was the weekend and I'd been looking forward to beating Sephiroth and finishing the game, and didn't feel like doing anything else. So I went to the internet, found a guide for where to find the raw materials for each synthesis item, and made use of my PC's DVD drive for background noise.
By the end of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, I'd gained some useful new equipment, but the list was still far from complete. I had, however, started to become invested in the task, there was something oddly calming about the repetitive gameplay with movies in the background.
After Dodgeball and both Kill Bill movies had run their course, I realised something. Hunting down all of these raw materials, some of which were rare drops, meant going through a lot of heartless, which meant gaining a lot of EXP, I had gone from under level 50, to somewhere approaching 80, and I'd barely noticed. I think I also had better accessories synthesised as well, but can't quite recall. The point being I'd become a good deal stronger.
I decided to take a break from the synthesis quest in order to see how I did against Ansem, the final boss, who, as mentioned above, I originally went to the arena in frustration after failing to defeat, I once again sat through the now tediously familiar cutscene preceeding the fight, and, to my surprise, swept the beach with his face with relative ease.
There was another phase or two after that I hadn't seen before, but the following too, was almost anticlimactically easy. I watched the ending cutscenes with a sense of pride and accomplishment the likes of which I was not used to feeling. I thought perhaps I'd call that done, but no, I couldn't just let it end here, I owed someone a rematch.
So, armed with my new appreciation for the value of putting in the time, tempered in good honest grinding and decked out in better gear with a good 30 extra levels, I went back to the arena and...yeah, no, he still dogwalked me, trying to fight him was like trying to wrestle a tornado made of knives. BUT! I lasted a lot longer that time, it now took him 4 hits to get my health down, 5 to kill me with Second Chance. (I think) Nevertheless though, I was bewildered, at a loss at what precisely I was expected to do.
What followed was several days of headbutting a brick wall. I happened across some strategies to hang in there, and I even managed to damage him enough that it started to show on his health bar, but once he started running instead of walking I just couldn't keep out of reach of his sword. YouTube wasn't something I spent time on at this point, if it existed at all, I'm not sure, if it did it was very new. In any case I wouldn't have thought to look up the fight to see how somebody else did it. GameFAQs was my oracle of choice, but, at least for now, but at this point, looking up a guide felt like admitting defeat. Happily, I never did end up resorting to that, but for now, this fight was beyond me. I returned to the synthesis list, even then I knew that I wasn't closing the stat gap in another 20 levels even if I got there, but perhaps the extra attack power and MP the Ultima Weapon keyblade would give me would allow me a little more versatility in battle.
Another Saturday and three Karate Kid movies later, I hit level 100, there was officially no more that EXP could do for me. But there was also another hard limit I'd noticed. I hadn't been doing noticeably more damage for several level-ups now, so just for the sake of comparison, I switched back from the Lionheart Keyblade, to the starting weapon, the Kingdom Key. It seemed to be doing the same physical damage.
It appeared that there was a hard cap for how much damage one can do in one hit, and I had reached it. How strong the weapon I was using happened to be was no longer relevant. I switched to the Spellbinder Keyblade, which gave me the same 2 extra MP the Ultima weapon would have, and knowing that I was as physically strong as I could be no matter the weapon, I functionally had the same power I would have had I bothered to make the final weapon anyway.
This was it, I was as strong as I was getting with or without the weapon, if I couldn't beat him now, I couldn't beat him. That in mind, I returned to the arena. What followed, was a few more hours of brick-wall headbutting before I developed muscle memory and habits that worked. Even then, he has this attack where he teleports to the other side of the ring, and if you don't get to him and smack him in time, he'll just cast a spell on you that automatically reduces your HP to 1 (rendering second chance pointless) and your MP to 0 so you can't cast magic to heal. Items have a longer use window, and by the time you get hit by it, it's too late to effectively use them because he'll kill you before they take effect. This was often the thing that was undoing me, but then I had an idea.
I'd observed that when one used a recovery item, there would be a short animation where Sora would throw the item up into the air a split second before it takes effect. I had been hit by this spell (which he signals by saying "descend, heartless angel") enough times that I had an idea of the sequence, he teleports, casts the spell, and if you don't hit him before an aura surrounds you, there's no getting out of it, but there is a window of time between that point, and taking the hit.
I had just been giving up if that aura got me, because I figured there was nothing I could do about it, but then, once when I tried to use an item to regain health, Sora threw the item up into the air, but he killed me before it took effect. I wondered if I could time an item-use, just right, so that the spell would hit me in that split-second window between use and effect, allowing me to recover. (I would later learn that guides recommend you do exactly this.)
As this was the hardest fight in the game, and the last thing I wanted to do, I saved outside, so as to reload to avoid wasting them, and loaded sora up with every Elixir (very rare healing item that restores you completely) we'd gathered throughout the game, it wasn't many, but it was enough to fill his item slots. It was quite motivating to know that there was a potential way back even if that bullshit spell hit me.
Over the next several attempts I failed to pre-empt the spell and subsequently failed to get the timing right for the Elixir and died. I was starting to doubt it would work, but then it did. On that attempt, for the first time, I got to phase...3 I think? When he says "I'll lead you to the promised land." (Side note, I don't know who thought that voice suited the character, but Lance Bass from NSYNC gave Sephiroth a very different voice to the one he would have from then on.) and then he proceeded to rock my shit and kill me, everything happened so fast that to this day, I'm not sure what the everything that happened was.
Attempts during which I lasted long enough to get to that point were rare, but it didn't take me by surprise again. I'd taken to the "Strike Raid" cheese, locking myself into a long animation of repeated throwing attacks during which I could not take damage, this, coupled with Aeroga, allowed me to survive things like Octoslash, and also damage him from a distance. (though as the fight went on, hitting him for damage became less reliable.)
I don't even know how many attempts it took, over how long a time, that particular context has faded from memory, it was 20+ years ago (Jesus Christ, time is terrifying,) But eventually, after many, many failed attempts, by a sliver of health and a lucky 4-hit combo, I got him. (the memory of which, as well as the adrenaline I was feeling, seems permanently seared into my brain.) The next few days I experienced another new phenomenon that anyone who's ever finished a really good book will be intimately familiar with. After the comedown, I felt bereft, and didn't know what to do with my free time. I occasionally feel this when I finish a really good book, or any other media that pulls me in.
From that day forward, I've been much less hesitant to put one foot in front of the other, so to speak. It was too late to salvage my schoolwork, but, I did go on to get a BTEC and two degrees, (rawdogging unmedicated ADHD made that a challenge, but I made it) due largely to understanding the one lesson this taught me;
There are no shortcuts, if there were, they wouldn't be shortcuts, they'd be the taught method, and there is value in the journey, the process is the point. I've never again shied away from a good grind in a game, in fact, I relish the opportunity to throw on an audiobook, or a podcast, and grind some levels.
Make time for your art, or hobbies, whatever your medium of choice, and enjoy the process, and the result will be all the sweeter. Don't let life take that joy from you.
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